Nikki Grahame's ex-boyfriend Pete Bennett says he is 'still grieving' five years on after the Big Brother star's death aged just 38 left him with 'next level trauma'

Nikki Grahame's ex-boyfriend Pete Bennett said he's 'still grieving' her death.

The Big Brother star died in 2021 aged just 38, after spending years battling an eating disorder.

Pete, who struck up a romance with the TV star during their time in the reality show together back in 2006, revealed he's still dealing with the 'trauma' of her passing five years on. 

During an interview with The Brighton Coach, Pete, 44, was asked about Nikki and he scolded the host, saying: "F*** off. What have you brought that up for? 

'I’ve literally had next level trauma for years. I’ve just literally just got over that and everywhere I go it’s the same, it’s really hard a lot of people want to talk about it.

'Imagine I brought up someone all the time, it’s hard. F”****** f***** me up, the whole thing.'

He went on to add: 'I’m getting there now, it’s taken me five years to get to where I’m at to be able to grieve her and grieve what happened and try and get to a place where it doesn’t trigger me anymore, because it is really triggering, the whole thing is horrible.

'And I miss her a lot, I just wish that I could... that’s what f**** me up, I wish I could say: "I’m sorry" and just give her a cuddle.'

He added: 'I told you, I get triggered, you’re talking about Nicki and it f**** me up.'

Nikki and Pete met and struck up a romance during a series of Big Brother in 2006. 

Pete won the show and the relationship continued after the season ended before later fizzling out.

However, the former couple maintained their friendship over the years and he was still in touch with her shortly before her death in 2021.

He said: "I knew she was ill, I'd see pictures of her out with Imogen [Thomas] and I knew she was looking thin, she contacted me in the last lockdown saying she'd been hospitalised again and she wanted me to come and rescue her or something.

'She got out again, we were still in contact… But recently when I saw the GoFundMe, it was a shock. When I saw her recently it was a complete difference, it was quite a shock.'

Speaking in 2021, Pete revealed he'd tried to arrange a surprise message from Nikki's musical hero, Kate Bush, to cheer her up when she was unwell but he was 'too late'.

He told Heat: 'I was looking to contact Kate Bush to see if she could send Nikki a message as I honestly thought that giving her a boost from her hero would help her start to feel more positive and recover.

'But then we got the news that she was gone. And it was too late.'